A subscriber wrote me recently
and asked: “I like your messages and they make me think. Thank you. My uncle
went to AA for only several years. He still doesn’t drink. From your messages I
sense you’ve been in AA a long time. After all these years, why do you still
need to go to meetings? My uncle didn’t.”
Thank you for another very good
question.
Coincidently (although I don’t
believe in them anymore), I received a message from a friend in AA who sent me
his weekly message about continuing to go to meetings. He concluded his
observations by stating: “I've always
been in awe of the wisdom that comes from the rooms. Even today, when I think I
know it all, I'm amazed by what can come out of a newcomer's mouth. When I'm
feeling scared, or discouraged, or disconnected …. I remind myself that if I
don't keep going to meetings, I won't keep hearing what God wants me to hear.”
[You, too, can receive his messages – simply go to
http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com]
To answer your question – yes – I’ve
been in AA for over 25 years and – yes – I still go to meetings. Normally I go
once a week. I still find my AA and ACIM meetings the primary sources of my
spiritual nourishment and fuel for continued growth. This has been especially
true for AA. I only began studying ACIM four years ago.
The key to my spiritual growth
is coming to grips with the reality that I cannot rely on my physical senses
and my perceived past experiences to define and understand my world. Relying only
on my senses, my selective memory, and using my cognitive skills simply hasn’t
worked. When I use this approach (and I’ve done it all my life, so it comes quite
naturally) I do not end up feeling peaceful, calm, happy, joyous or free. I
feel frustrated, angry, irritated, resentful, confused, anxious and fearful.
So - how do I NOT rely on my
senses? On my past experience? On my rational skills?
As I came into AA, I was sick
and tired of being physically sick and tired. After more than 25 years of
sobriety I found myself being sick and tired of being anything but peaceful,
calm, happy, joyous or free. I was looking for a better way of living – in
terms of my sense of spiritual growth and fulfillment.
Going to AA keeps me from going
back to where I used to be. If I go back, it’s all over. Studying A Course in
Miracles (ACIM) keeps me on track in terms of learning a new reality that is
teaching me who I really am. I am not a
body, not what I think, and not what I perceive. I am an already-loved
peaceful spirit currently having a human experience. I just need to find that
“me,” and live that “me.”
In AA the old-timers would tell
me, “Acceptance is the key. First, accept you are addicted. Secondly, accept
people as they are. You can’t change them – nor places nor things. If you try,
you will lose your serenity and drink again. And remember, acceptance doesn’t
mean approval. Just accept (love) them and let them go. That’s the only way you
can accept yourself with all your flaws. Once you’ve learned that you can begin
to live and love in your serenity, and living your life that way will demonstrate acceptance and love to
the rest of the world.”
Similarly, ACIM teaches me that
my perception of things is always skewed by my fearful egoistic view of the
world. So is everyone else’s. My problems always seem to begin when I try to
force my perceptions on another while preventing them from forcing their
perceptions on me. [Just watch a staunch
Republican “conversing” with a staunch Democrat; or an Israeli with a
Palestinian!] The one thing that seems to be universal is that all of us
have to/need to BE RIGHT. By relying on our perceptions the
only other thing that is universal is that we ALL are always wrong!
I’ve included a link to a video from
Flixxy.com. It was filmed on-site by an anonymous source. It shows a group of
young girls in black and white tights performing a trippy dance to the popular
tune of the German folk-rock polka band Hiss. The
video is very cute and creative. When I focus my sight on their legs, my brain
(based on my perceived past experience) is telling me those legs do not belong
to the correct bodies. If I focus on their heads, my brain tells me their legs
are not connected. As I looked at the dancers, my eyes were telling me one thing
but my brain would not believe it.
This video is a simple little
reminder to me (and you?) of what the Course says about my ego's constant perception
of things – it’s not reality, it’s only my perception. Yet I still have the
audacity to be confident that I‘m right and justified in arguing with all who
disagree.
No wonder I go through most of
my life in logjam after logjam after logjam.
Although these messages are
mostly for me, thanks for listening. As always – feel free to forward this
message to your friends, family, and those accompanying you on your spiritual
journey.
Don
#4 March, 2013
Copyright, 2013
No comments:
Post a Comment