East Tennessee is still
recovering and cleaning up after a horrendous two weeks of snow, ice, rain,
more ice and high winds. I have cleaned up most of the downed tree limbs (only
one entire tree, fortunately) and general mess on our property. Most limbs were
about 15 to 20 feet long and about the size of my thigh where they broke off
from the trunk.
First I dragged and pulled the
stuff together in four area of our yard. Then I waited until more rain had come
and gone. Then I was able to use my chain saw to cut the smaller limbs off and
saw up the bigger stuff into fireplace-sized pieces. After stacking this up, I
was left with all the twisted, interconnected, and intertwined smaller
branches. Those have been awful to remove and grind up in my chipper. I’ll grab
a branch and a pencil-lead-sized twig at the end of a 40-lb, branch will get
entwined with anther similar twig from another set of branches. Those two
little twigs will hang on to each other until I am trying to pull 150 lbs. of
limbs while balancing on one foot and holding onto my chain saw and my nippers.
It’s amazing how resilient these
cute, little twigs can be.
Once I just stopped and screamed.
Once I simply laughed out loud at the ridiculousness of the whole situation. Most
of the time I’d just smile as I took my nippers to one of these twigs, saying
quietly, “Take that, you little shit.”
But these intertwined and
interconnected limbs reminded me of my thought process. One thought gets
introduced to another, which is tied to a third, and the next thing I know my
mind is off in places so far removed from the task at hand, it’s amazing. “How
did I end up thinking about this?” I’d wonder. I had started off thinking about
the limbs, then moved on to politicians and their shifting political
gamesmanship, and ended up standing there angry about biblical literalists as
well as Islamic fundamentalists. How did that happen?
I realized that my thoughts were
being driven by my emotions. One “frustration” emotion-thought will lead to
another and then to a “resentful” emotion-thought, which will lead to another
and on to an “exasperated” emotion and its related memories and thoughts. It
reminded me of that adage, “Whenever you mentally take a trip down memory lane
you’ll find yourself in dangerous territory.”
But – and this is the important
observation I made – this is the ego mind I use to navigate my self through life!
No wonder I can get myself into such a tizzy – especially over the little
things – like twigs, not downed limbs. I’ve heard in AA meetings: It’s not the
bears that will chase you out of the woods. It’s the mosquitoes.
From A Course In Miracles, Workbook
for Students, Lesson 71.2,3: “The ego’s
plan for salvation [finding happiness, being at peace, being centered,
being fulfilled] centers around holding
grievances [having upsets, frustrations, being angry, condemning, having judgments/opinions,
relishing self-pity, having expectations, trying to be in control, fighting to
be right]. It maintains that, if someone
else spoke or acted differently, if some external circumstance or event were
changed, you would be saved. Thus, the source of salvation is constantly
perceived as outside yourself. Each grievance you hold is a declaration, an
assertion in which you believe, that says, ‘If this were different, I would be
saved.’ The change of mind necessary for salvation is thus demanded of everyone
and everything except yourself.
“The role assigned to your own mind in this plan, then, is simply to
determine what, other than itself, must change if you are to be saved [finding
happiness, being at peace, being centered, being fulfilled]….This fruitless search will continue, for the illusion persists that,
although this hope has failed before, there is still grounds for hope in other
places and in other things. Another person [including an
out-there-somewhere God] will yet serve
better; another situation will yet offer success.”
How can I escape this? Let God’s
plan for my salvation go to work for me. What is His plan for me? To be happy.
To be joyous, To be free. To be forgiving. To allow my defects, guilt and fear
to be removed so the light within me (which has always been there) can shine.
The Holy Spirit will then use me to become the Light of the world.
How do I turn my life over? By
being still. By training my mind to quiet itself and to learn to listen – not
to the raucous voices of my twig-like ego – but to the whispers of the Holy
Spirit. By asking God to reveal His plan for me – asking what He would have me
do, where He would have me go, and what He would have me say and to whom. And
then simply listen for His whispers. [Lesson 71.9]
Although these messages are
mostly for me, thanks for listening. As always – feel free to forward this
message to your friends, family, and those accompanying you on your spiritual
journey.
Don
#3 March 2015
Copyright 2015
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